How this Pregnancy is Different
I spent the first few weeks of this pregnancy comparing it to my previous two. Pregnancy after loss was nerve-wrecking for my first trimester. The slightest cramps made me go into panic mode, and then on Christmas Eve we had a scare that made me call my midwife for an impromptu appointment in hopes of hearing our baby’s heartbeat with doppler (we didn’t use doppler with Evie, and intended to not use with Olive.) At this point I had to make the conscious decision to be at peace that this pregnancy is going to be different.
What I planned was everything would be like our first pregnancy. All the same; decisions (minus a few tweaks we’ve done more research on), register for the same items that we were still in need of, etc. The things we’re keeping the same (at least at this point) are as follows:
We are planning another beautiful home-birth*.
We will not be going for an ultrasound - this is a personal decision that we have researched thoroughly and feel in the absence of a medical need we will not be going in for one.
I’m doing HypnoBirthing just as I did with both my previous births and that includes prenatal bonding.
We are still planning to document our labor and birth. Evie’s FAVORITE movie to watch lately is her birth video and it is something that we cherish. Worth EVERY PENNY as far as we are concerned.
Here we are at 17 weeks pregnant and we have already changed from our first time:
Waiting until birth to know the baby’s sex: I just sent in my bloodwork yesterday and should know soon who we are talking to! We both had such peace with Evie’s pregnancy and waited to know who she was until we met her, but after Olive, it changed things for me. I don’t like not knowing if Olive was a boy or girl, and I wish I had a pronoun to describe Olive. We also now have Evie who is INCREDIBLY hands-on with her baby brother or sister already and I think knowing who I am growing will just add to her excitement. I have had a gut feeling since 9 weeks, so we’ll see!
Interviewing care providers: With Evie, we went with the first care provider we “interviewed”. I’m in a much different position this time since I have business relationships with the majority of midwives and birth-workers in the area now. I decided after multiple interviews and conversations to change our care from our previous experience with Evie and after our first two prenatal appointments, I am ecstatic with our decision.
Diet: My pregnancy with Evie I unfortunately had the “eating for two” mentality and truly used it as an excuse to eat anything and everything I was craving. I know better now, so I am doing better this time. Due to still healing from Hashimoto’s and hypothyroidism my diet has remained the same as it was prior to conceiving - clean and with the intent of healing and nourishing not only my body but also our baby’s.
Bodywork: Since we used Pinnacle Chiropractic and 941 Wellness to aid our fertility during our weekly appointments we are obviously starting chiropractic care earlier than 30-something weeks with Evie (when I could barely walk or bend over). Acupuncture appointments are helping my anxiety and I’ll be upping both of these treatments as pregnancy progresses! I’m adding more prenatal massages to this pregnancy and absolutely plan to add a handful to my 4th trimester. My goal is to be as active as possible throughout this entire pregnancy.
Pregnancy After Loss: This pregnancy is a pregnancy after loss, which means it requires A LOT more work on my part than it did before to remain at peace and choose calm over stress. It makes me prioritize gratitude instead of investing my energy in anxiety.
Work: I did not work when I was pregnant with Evie. Zach got an amazing promotion a couple of weeks after we found out I was pregnant so I was fortunate enough to be able to rest (I seriously feel like I slept throughout Evie’s pregnancy). This pregnancy has been very different with my workload. I ended up attending two births during this pregnancy (I have since stopped and have a couple of doulas I am referring out to), and I have continued teaching and encapsulating. Sitting with this realization has made me move up my maternity leave so I can again focus on being calmer and at peace instead of rushing all over town on days that I work. All of that in addition to I have Evie. These are our last precious months together with it being just her and I at home and I want to soak up every second I can.
Planning for Postpartum: This is the biggest change and the one I am the most passionate about. I am planning my 4th trimester. Zach is planning to take off more paternity time than he did with Evie. For the next 6 months, I am taking Innate Traditions Postpartum Training (more on this training later) so I can not only serve families better when I return to this work after my maternity leave, but selfishly so I have tools that I did not have after my previous births. Our registry’s top requests are funds for my 4th-trimester care (meals, house cleaning, bodywork, etc.) and only the things we truly need.
Writing these out has helped me see all the differences and lean into embracing them. All the kicks and rolling around I feel daily are constant reminders that all is well and will continue to be.
*when we purchased the home in ‘17 one of the first things I considered was where my birth tub was going to be.